What can be used against you in a custody battle? A divorce can be highly distressing. Having to decide who will have custody of your children may be very taxing for all parties involved. Nonetheless, it is essential to remember that the court will observe your every move during legal proceedings and outside of court. Your conduct can and does significantly impact your child custody dispute.
If you have a thorough awareness of what your ex-spouse may attempt to use against you in your custody struggle, you will be able to avoid committing several errors.
Keep on reading for What can be used against you in a custody battle?
Factors that Affect A Custody Battle
1. The parent’s behaviour and attitude: If a parent is abusive, or has been arrested or convicted of an offence, the other parent can use this against you in court. Additionally, if your former spouse can prove that you are engaging in behaviours that do not put your child’s wellbeing as a priority – such as drug use, alcohol abuse, or a lack of appropriate supervision – then this could be used against you in court.
2. The parent’s lifestyle: If your former spouse can show that your current lifestyle is detrimental to the wellbeing and development of your child, this could be used as evidence against you in court. For example, if you have unstable housing or an inconsistent work/income history, your former spouse can use this to their advantage.
3. The parent’s relationship with the child: If you are estranged from your children, it will be difficult to demonstrate that you are a capable and responsible parent. Your former spouse may use this to argue in favour of them having custody of the children.
Now, continue to read for 9 things of what can be used against you in a custody battle.
What can Be Used Against You in A Custody Battle?
The following items should be avoided because these are what can be used against you in a custody battle dispute:
#1 Engaging in Verbal/Physical Altercations
A custody battle can bring about a wide range of passionate emotions and feelings, but it is essential to remember that any verbal or physical altercation you have with your child’s other parent may be used against you in the courtroom.
The key to success lies within self-control; speak calmly and logically, never resort to raising your voice, and absolutely refrain from getting physical. If done correctly, this way of handling arguments has the potential to significantly strengthen your position during custody proceedings.

#2 Bringing Your New Partner Around Your Child
Even if your child custody agreement hasn’t been formalized by a court, you should avoid including anyone you’re seeing in any contacts with your child. This should continue for an extended amount of time after the divorce is finalized.
Keep things polite after the divorce to avoid any upheaval for yourself and your child. Failure to do so may result in unnecessary misunderstanding, drama, or tension, which may eventually lead to legal concerns. As a result, it’s best to keep your cool after a divorce.
Keep on reading for What can be used against you in a custody battle.
#3 Criticizing Your Child’s Other Parent to Anyone
Keep in mind that this restriction applies to both family and friends. Basically, whatever you say to someone might be used against you in a custody dispute, casting you in an unflattering light in the eyes of the court.
Although confidants may not intend to reveal your secrets, they may be forced to do so by a court subpoena or deposition. It is out of their hands at this point since they are legally compelled to reveal the truth – which may entail betraying your trust.

#4 Not Paying Your Child Support or Not Seeing to Your Other Parental Responsibilities
If you are required to pay child support and/or alimony to your former partner, it is critical that you do so on time, especially if the orders were issued by a court.
If you fail to comply with the court’s interim or permanent order by failing to make any payments, your negligence may be considered contempt of court. Furthermore, failure to pay child support or alimony may imply that you are an uncaring parent who is unconcerned about your child’s well-being, which may lead to more serious legal consequences down the road.
Similarly, consistency is key when it comes to dropping off and picking up your children for visits. It’s critical that you stick to the agreed-upon time and location for these conversations with the other parent.
#5 Stopping Contact between Your Child and Their Other Parent
Even if you and the other parent of your child are in disagreement, it is strictly prohibited for you to deny them appropriate contact with their child as long as they have legal visitation rights that are being respected by the court.
If you make this mistake, the other parent can file a contempt of court complaint, prompting the court to review your child custody and placement agreement. If they do so, it is highly likely that the result won’t be in your favor – potentially limiting or completely changing your contact with your child as per their visitation and/or custody agreement.

#6 Removing Your Child from Their Regular Activities
A divorce can be especially damaging to your child’s mental and emotional state, based on their age. For that reason, it is essential to establish a sense of security through routine.
If they were already participating in any activities prior to the divorce, make sure they continue those same activities afterwards – this will help them maintain a healthy balance during such an uncertain time.
There are 3 more things you need to consider about what can be used against you in a custody battle.
#7 Removing Your Child from School or Daycare without Notifying the Other Parent
As the primary custodian of your child, you should always keep them in daycare or school unless there is a valid explanation for taking them out.
Your ex could present evidence to the court demonstrating any times your kid has been tardy or absent from their educational institution with printouts from said center. This could be used against you if they take legal action.
#8 Abusing Alcohol and/or Drugs
It is critical that you take steps to ensure your child’s safety and well-being, including avoiding substance abuse. Doing so not only benefits your little one but also prevents your ex from using it as evidence against you in custody disputes. When it comes to divorcing an alcoholic and related custody, substance is a huge factor that courts will take into consideration.
#9 Refusing to Follow the Court’s Requests
You have a chance to demonstrate your dedication to your child and win custody if you are willing to comply with any request from the court. Now is the optimum time for that! If they need you to join a parenting class or attend counseling, do it immediately without hesitation. Taking this action will prove how devoted you are in demonstrating your kid’s best interest.
This is also the last one of what can be used against you in a custody battle. You should revise your local custody attorney for more detail.
How Does the Court Decide Child Custody?
When deciding who will have custody of your child, the judge will use what most courts call the “best interest of the child standard.” The court must evaluate the entire situation, in order to properly determine child placement, parenting time, and the best interest of your child.
Some of the factors they take into consideration include:
- The amount of time your child has been under the care and control of any person other than a parent, as well as the relevant circumstances.
- The wants of each parent, as they relate to any residence agreement reached by you and your ex that your family law attorney submitted to the court.
- The interrelationship and interaction of your child with both you and the other parent, as well as any other person(s) who could have a significant impact on your child’s best interest.
- The way your child has adjusted to their home, community, and school.
- Any evidence or allegations of domestic abuse
- Any evidence or allegations of sexual abuse
- If you or your ex has to be registered as a sex offender
- If you or your ex is residing with anyone who has to register as a sex offender
- If you or your ex has ever been convicted of child abuse
- If you or your ex is living with someone who has been convicted of child abuse
- If you or your spouse has a history of drug and/or alcohol abuse
Conclusion
While there is no way to guarantee you will prevail, using the above information about what can be used against you in a custody battle can give you a fighting chance and help you avoid actions that can hurt your case.
One of the most important things you can do to help yourself during a child custody battle is to have a good family law attorney by your side.
While you are committed to winning your child custody battle in your heart, you need to be able to show the court your willingness to work with your ex-spouse and demonstrate the reasons why your child would benefit from you having custody.
FAQs of What Can be Used Against in Custody Battle
What things make judges deny a custody?
A judge will likely deny custody to a parent if they have committed any form of child abuse, domestic violence, substance abuse or neglect. Additionally, if the parent is deemed irresponsible—such as having a criminal history, not paying child support or being unemployed—they could be denied custody.
What are some evidence that can be used in a custody trial?
Evidence that may be used in a custody trial includes documents, photos and videos of the child’s home environment, medical records, school performances reports and any other relevant records. Additionally, witnesses such as family members, friends or professionals can testify regarding their observations.
What is considered neglect in a custody battle?
Neglect in a custody battle is defined as a parent’s failure to provide the necessary care, supervision, education and protection for their child. This can include physical abuse, negligence in providing proper nutrition or medical care and failing to meet the emotional needs of the child.
What should I wear in a custody battle?
It is important to dress professional and conservatively. You want to appear respectable, so what you wear should show the judge that you take your child custody battle seriously.
Can I be forced to pay for my ex’s attorney fees in a custody battle?
Generally speaking, no. Each court will look at the individual circumstances of your case. The court may, however, order that you pay a certain amount towards the attorney fees in some cases. It is important to speak with an experienced family law attorney to better understand what your obligations may be.
How long does a custody battle take?
This depends on the individual facts of your case. Generally speaking, the process can take anywhere from a few weeks to several months or even years. You should speak with an experienced family law attorney to get a better idea of what you may be looking at in terms of time frame and what steps need to be taken along the way.