All the examples of parental alienation that you need to know about! Divorce and custody battles often cause emotions to run high. However, your child could be receiving quietly transmitted messages by both you and your ex-spouse that may cause them to become alienated from one parent.
Check out the list of examples of parental alienation carefully to be aware of it.
Parental Alienation – What is That?
Parental alienation is a psychological disorder that refers to the actions of one parent, often the custodial parent, who fails to properly use their parental rights.
This can be done through persistent negative behaviors or teachings towards the other parent, or by brainwashing your child into hating or disrespecting them.
What Are Examples of Parental Alienation?
There are many examples of parental alienation. The most common signs are listed below. They include:
- Making your child choose whether they want to visit the other parent.
- Not letting you access your child’s medical and/or school records, extracurricular schedules, etc. unless you put up a fight.
- Telling your child all the reasons for the divorce in excruciating detail and placing blame on one specific person. The alienating parent usually blames the other spouse for things going wrong in marriage without taking any responsibility themselves..
- Making it seem like all of the financial problems, lifestyle changes, or even having a new partner is entirely due to breaking up with their previous partner
- If you choose not to be flexible with the visitation schedule in response to your child’s needs, or if the other parent places your child into so many activities that there is little time for visitation, this creates tension.
- Do not require your child to choose between you and your ex-spouse. This will only put them in the middle of a difficult situation.
- Avoid using your child as a spy or information gatherer regarding your life after the divorce. This is unfair and could be damaging to their relationship with both parents.
- Acting hurt or sad when your child has a good time visiting with you sends mixed signals to them about what they should feel. It’s okay for them to enjoy their time spent with both parents separately without feeling guilty.
- Making demands upon you that are contrary to the orders of the court puts additional stress on everyone involved, including yourself and most importantly, your children
- Interfering with your visitation by putting temptations in front of your child.
- Someone disparaging you in front of your child. This includes using pejorative terms to describe you.
- Filing false allegations of child abuse with the court and/or repeatedly dragging you to court over child support or alimony.
- Not allowing your child to visit extended family members such as grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
- Creating barriers between you and your child’s communication. This includes preventing access to school and/or medical records.
- Refusing to reveal one’s address.
- Failure to inform you of any medical, educational, or other events involving your child.
- Consistently not enforcing your visitation, claiming that your child does not want to see you.
- Making your child feel responsible for your or your ex-spouse’s happiness, to the point where your child is protective of the alienating parent as if they were a child.
- Discussing and/or involving your child in child support, court hearings, or other legal matters in which the child has no place.
- If a call does not fit the alienating parent’s agenda, the alienating parent will hang up on the caller.
- Refusing to communicate with you via fax, email, etc., so that no paper trail is left.
- Although they believe they have the right to arrive late for your visitation, they demand that your child must be returned precisely on time.
- Making your youngster feel guilty when he or she displays a desire to see you.
- Instructing your child’s school that you cannot be trusted, meddling, or stating unequivocally that you have lied to others about them and your child, including posting notes in school files prohibiting you from picking up your child.
- Attempting to exert total control over your child’s social life.
- Lying to your child about the divorce, including providing them with false details, hinders their ability to love you.
- Informing your child that you are abusing, stalking, and/or harassing them to the point of calling the police is a kind of child abuse. This may involve the alienating parent submitting false charges of child abuse and/or complaints with social services.
- Encouraging your child to disregard your home’s rules.
- If you give your child a present, the alienating parent may refuse to allow it in their home or prohibit the child from keeping it.
- Refusing to allow them to bring their pet with them on visiting, especially if you welcome the animal.
- Attempting to bribe, coerce, or scare you into signing court documents that exclude you from your child’s life or do something to strengthen the position of the alienating parent.
- The alienating parent may attempt to physically or psychologically rescue your child when there is no immediate danger.
- Encouraging your child’s anger towards you.
- Even if there is no evidence, encourage your child to lie to authorities about how they are treated while in your care.
- Removing money from your child’s bank account that you’ve given them and not allowing them to use it, or if the alienating parent has not spent the money on your child.
And if you want to know about parental alienation against mother, explore what exactly parental alienation against mother involves and how best to tackle such situations if they arise.
What Can You Do About Parental Alienation?
If you believe your ex is attempting to estrange you from your children, it’s crucial that you take note of everything. Keep a careful calendar recording all visitations and missed visitations. To battle and go against those examples of parental alienation, staying calm is key; if you respond with anger, you’re only giving fuel to the fire by proving their claims that you’re irrational.
Afterwards, it takes a very trained mental health professional to detect that your offspring is going through parental alienation. They might demand that you, your child, and your former spouse take several psychological tests, do a comprehensive history, and watch all of you together or individually. Once they finish this analysis, they will provide suggestions and draft a report on the family. Without court intervention, nothing will happen to improve the situation of parental alienation. Consult with a knowledgeable family law attorney for help soon.
After you receive the report from your health professional, take it to court with your family law attorney. The court may need convincing that your child is being alienated and removal from their current environment is in their best interest. Work with your attorney to come up an effective parenting plan that will show the court how well capable you are of taking care of your child should they be placed in your custody.
Remember that you may have to spend a bit more money than usual to make sure your parental alienation complaint is successful.
Lastly, always focus on your child. It is beneficial for you and your case if you never speak poorly about your ex-spouse in front of them, or allow them to hear any negative phone conversations. Additionally, court documents should also be kept hidden from children’s sight.
How Do the Courts View Parental Alienation?
In the past, family law judges were inclined to be quite traditional when handing down orders. Even if there was a great deal of evidence suggesting your child was being alienated, the court might still rule that it was in the best interest of the child for both parents to share decision-making power.
If the estranged parent does not face legal repercussions, such as jail time or fines, family law judges are unlikely to put severe sanctions on that individual. Consequently, it is improbable that an out-of-control parent can be stopped without these type of consequences.
If the court orders are broken during a dramatic situation, then the primary custody may be changed by force. Usually, it’s just a matter of time before the parent who is causing alienation becomes desperate and does something too drastic. If that happens, then the court might start to see that this parent is losing control and offer support.
FAQs
What is the definition of narcissistic parental alienation?
The narcissistic parental alienation syndrome, or parental alienation syndrome (PAS), happens when one parent attempts to alienate their child from an otherwise loving parent through coercion. This manipulation subsequently causes the child to detest or reject the alienated parent.
What are the 17 signs of parental alienation checklist?
It starts with badmouthing other parent, limiting the contact with the child,…
You can find out more at 17 parental alienation checklist.
What occurs when parental alienation is established?
Parental alienation is not a crime in and of itself, but evidence of parental alienation may be used to modify custody or visitation orders in favor of the alienated parent. If a parent has committed a crime in an attempt to alienate the other parent, this may result in additional criminal charges.
Conclusion
Parental alienation is a very real phenomenon that is more prevalent than you might assume. As your children age, it may be able to reverse the estrangement via the application of appropriate psychological therapy. Nonetheless, if the alienating parent is not halted, it might be difficult to overcome.
The examples of parental alienation can be tough to determine, even for divorce professionals. It is crucial that you have the support of caring individuals at this incredibly stressful period. Parental alienation is difficult, but there is a great deal of hope if you take the right actions and behave appropriately.
